Watch the incredible life story of this couple, testifying that Jesus is real, true, forgiving, and redemptive having revealed to them the brokenness of the world, the sin of being separated from him, the sinful choices they made like that of murdering their 4 unborn babies, onslaught of confusion about life, the trappings of sin, the distance from God, the worldliness of temptations, redefining truth and love, and discovering reconciliation.
The litany of questions create chaos in the mind like: How do you "atone" for this? Is this okay? What really is love? Fear and worry bring heaviness and conversations lead to redefining truth and love to get what we want like convenience, "If you love me enough, you will take me [relationship and abortion]. I will do this with or without you."
How do you atone? Work harder and longer. Work away from home. Fill up with other things like pornography. On and on it will go -- endlessly trying to replace the endless God of the universe.
Towards the end of the video, she reflects on the process that led her from grief to God, "Someone comes in to tear off your limbs and that's to be okay? ... Trying to hold that pain and all those emotions, attacks against my soul, under water. Started to do drugs ... I wanted to be in control ... You have to go through grieving ... It's so deep. It's so deep ... The Lord was wooing me to himself. I would push against it. I will not be vulnerable. But you have to surrender ..."
